Suburban Monk How then shall we live… in suburbia.

The other day I was heading out to Starbucks to get some work done. Almost every time I leave one of the kids asks me if they can come. I decided that it didn’t make sense because I was in a rush and didn’t have the emotional bandwidth to deal with another small creature so I was prepared to say “no”. Memory asked me at the top of the stairs if she could come and I said “no”. She asked “why not?” and I said “because.” As I was putting my shoes on she said “pleeeeeeeeeease!”. I said “no” again. This is not a very hard thing to do since I’ve had a lot of practice. Finally, as I was getting in the van she asked one last time. I said “no” for the third time. I backed the van out of the driveway and as I was driving away I saw her waving bye to me from the front yard. I couldn’t handle it. I put the car in reverse and had her hop in the front seat. Driving down the hill I was trying to figure out how this happened and I got to thinking about those weird passages in the Bible when God changes his mind. People have different ways to explain it but for the first time I felt like maybe I understood it a tiny bit. A part of me wanted Memory to stop asking. It didn’t make sense to take her and it was annoying to get the same question repeatedly. But evidently a bigger part of me wanted her to want to be with me. I’ve come to believe in a God that wants us to want him. He doesn’t seem to mind us being impolite and annoying. He wants it so bad that he may change his mind.